


so heavy

by rudeandginger



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-21
Updated: 2019-08-21
Packaged: 2020-09-23 15:41:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,047
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20342551
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rudeandginger/pseuds/rudeandginger
Summary: A superhero, a hard day, and the woman who makes it all worth the pain.





	so heavy

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah, I wrote things while I was gone. Here, have a glut.

It's 2am, and Kara has spent six hours fighting the latest alien threat to National City. She flies straight home, unlatching her windows and almost stumbling into her dark apartment. She picks up a heartbeat inside, but it's slow and steady, and then there are gentle hands unfastening her cape.

“I was beginning to think you'd be out all night,” Lena says softly as she takes the cape off and begins to fold it.

“I'm so glad you're here,” Kara replies with a relieved sigh.

“I sleep better in your bed,” Lena admits, laughing softly. Her fingers trace the back of Kara's neck til they hit the hidden zipper.

“I could do this,” Kara says. “In just a second.”

“Please let me take care of my hero,” Lena replies, taking the zipper down smoothly. “It’s the least I can do.” She runs tender fingertips down the newly revealed skin, willing Kara to acquiesce.

Kara sighs with contentment and lets Lena undress her carefully, accepting the loose shirt slipped over her head and stepping into the sleep shorts she's offered.

“Welcome home, my love,” Lena says, taking Kara's face in her hands and giving her a gentle kiss.

Kara hums happily, wrapping her arms around Lena's waist. “I love being home when you're here. Things aren't so -heavy-.”

Lena's hands slide down and curl around the back of Kara's neck. “Heavy is the head that wears the crown.”

Kara whimpers slightly. “I don't want to be a hero anymore…” She lays her head on Lena's shoulder and snuggles in closer.

“We can talk about that in the morning,” Lena says softly, threading her fingers into the hair of Kara's nape. “Come to bed.”

Kara's sigh is almost a sob. “I don't deserve you, Lena…when will I lose you too?”

“I’m not going anywhere,” Lena says, low and intense in Kara's ear. She’s used to this now, the fear of separation that surfaces when Kara is pushed beyond her limits, too fatigued mentally and physically. “I'm all yours.”

Kara lets out a little moan at that. “Promise?”

“I promise.” Lena kisses Kara's ear.

“I'm so -tired-,” Kara cries, the tears falling down Lena's collarbone. Lena is the only one she'll ever allow to witness this. Supergirl is a rock, and her co-workers don't need the added stress of knowing the city's superhero sometimes creaks at the seams. Lena is the only one who understands her on the deepest level. The Luthor crown is as hurtful as the Super one can be, and they have both been forced to their knees due to the weight before.

Lena lets her lover cry, holding her close. She doesn't say anything, because Kara isn't soothed by meaningless platitudes, never has been. She just holds her against the hurt; the lifetime of pain, awkwardness, and brutal -loneliness- that accompany being marooned on an alien world without a home and being forced to fit in, hiding your true self. Lena lives in awe of Kara, that she would choose to serve the very people who ostracized her, injured her, isolated her. Sometimes the choice seems too much, and Lena can only try her best to ease the cruelty of it all.

Kara lets herself have the moment, embraces the vulnerability and the stillness it brings when the storm passes. She no longer allows the inner voice to berate and tell her that's weak and stupid; the first and only time she articulated those thoughts in front of her lover, Lena cried, telling her how terrible it was that such a good person had internalized such hatred. Kara had worked on it every spare moment she could snatch, and the day she told Lena she'd finally silenced the voice, the responding joy had been so pure she wanted to hang onto it forever. So she doesn't need much anymore, just to let the acute pain and exhaustion run its course. The world is heavy and cruel, but it's not her fault anymore, it never really was. The tears slow, then stop.

“Bed time?” Lena untangles her fingers and runs her hands down Kara's back soothingly.

“Please,” Kara whispers, kissing the skin made damp by her tears, an apology for trespass against perfection.

Lena tucks Kara in with a gentle kiss. When she slips under the covers, Kara pulls her close, hands roaming everywhere. But Lena knows the hands are searching for her reality, Kara making sure that what's precious to her hasn't slipped through her fingers while she was gone. She arches into Kara's touch as best she can, affirming her existence to the woman she loves.

Kara lets out shaky breaths as her fingers trail over Lena's body. She's warm and trembling slightly from the middle of the night waking, but pressing up against Kara's hands, willing her to believe in what keeps her going. National City and all its citizens are important, yes, but Kara would hang up the cape and leave it all if not for the sweet muse next to her. Lena knows what it is like to witness life lost, the waves of guilt that threaten to drown you after. She knows all of Kara's weaknesses now, knows what scares her, what hurts her. Lena has seen Kara's personal demons. And through it all, she has -stayed-.

Kara traces Kryptonian love poems on Lena's hip bones and trails never-ending kisses between them. Her fingers and tongue worship every inch of her reluctant goddess, Lena coming undone underneath her whenever she asks. She is Kara's temple, the only place she offers her prayers. Lena knows, she accepts, she stays. Kara has lost so many in such a short time. Her occupation comes with constant loss, constant ache. But Lena stays, her mere presence a soothing balm over the angry pulsating of a city's raw need to be -saved-, and Kara is born again, pure and sweet, through her kiss.

They fall asleep tangled up in each other, Lena's sleep thankfully dreamless while Kara recalls home, the safe home on Krypton with her parents, aunt, and baby cousin. But this time, Lena is at her side, sparring playfully with her parents regarding science jargon that goes over Kara's head.

And Kara knows, for -sure-, that wherever Lena is, that is her -home-.


End file.
